How long have you been together for? M: We've been dating 3 years at the end of August, married for 2 months. J: Do I answer too? M: Yes but you took too long so I jumped in. J: Oh..
How did you meet? M: You can go. J: Ummm. M: Well we met in a spa, not at church haha and I was going to Bec's for a girls thing, and James just decided to show up with Deb and that's how we met for the first time. J: Yeah it was Deb, Dawn's sister, and then Megs, myself and Bec.
And were you both interested straight away? M: No. J: No not really. M: Not at all. J: From there we hung out more at Deb's house. M: Yeah we had a lot of mutual friends. J: Yeah we hung out a lot in groups, and then I asked Jay for her number.
So from there Megan were you interested? M: Mmmm noooooo, not really. I didn't think anything of it at the start, and then maybe a month into texting, it started becoming every day and I was like 'Oh yeah' ... just playing it cool, playing a bit hard to get. No one said anything but I knew he was keen. Yeah then we texted for another month and a half or so and then he asked me out.
Was your first kiss before or after? M: I wouldn't let him kiss me until we were official - put that in there! J: On your couch I think! Hahaha M: It was! On your couch while I was house sitting. J: Hahaha. Well it's a comfy couch.
What is the best date you have ever been on? M: Oooh this is a hard one. J: Our whole life is a date. M: *looks at James* It's not a date. I'll let you take this one while I have a think. Is that bad if you don't know what your best date is? J: It's because we do a lot... this is the thing, we always disagree on this right, we do a lot, like we are always doing mini dates.. M: No, we're not. He thinks we're doing mini dates. J: It depends what you define as a date.. M: Look he thinks, you know, when we're together at home or going out to grab something, it's quality time.. J: Like if I go to church and meet her for lunch before I go to work, that's us time, you know. So I count that as..I mean I know it's not dress up, present flowers and go out in a tux but yeah.. M: When I say it's a date night, I plan it, it's intentional, no phones, you know. I think our best dates are when we are travelling. We do a lot of dates when we travel together. So when we are overseas or interstate, I think those for me are the most special ones because we're somewhere different, doing something different. So I don't think I have a best date, just lots of good ones.
Have you got a worst date then? M: Do we have a worst date? J: *James looking very unsure whether to speak or not* M: Go! J: Haha well it's important to know it's not worst because of the company, but the actual thing was not anywhere near my ideal type of night, and that was when we sat here and did nothing! (In their lounge room at home) M: Hahahahaha. J: Meg goes 'No phone, no tv, no nothing.' We sat here...she even said you have to sit on the floor!! Hahaha. M: I tried to make it a picnic. Haha.
Did you have any entertainment? M: Haha no. We just sat here the whole time. J: We just got pizza and sat. M: I had music, music was on haha.
Was this dating or married? J: Married. M: Wait was it married? Yeah it was. J: Because we ended up just going to bed. Hahaha, but that was only bad because it's not my kind of date. Although it was meant to be my turn to organise it... M: So we have these date night schedules where we like... you know how some people do every week for date night, we can't do that. So we plan and we do 2 a month and I'm meant to plan one and he's meant to plan one. He hasn't planned one yet in 2 months! It's been 4 date nights. J: Ok in my defence right, because we do so many mini dates, if I go and plan a date, going to a restaurant to me, is like, you know, that's an easy way out because we do it a lot. M: Noooo.... J: So I'm looking for like something that is a surprise for her, like going to an event or a musical or something, but then it comes at a price. So you end up spending $300-350 with dinner like $400 for a date night! M: It doesn't have to be much, but this is where we only have 2 a month, and you can plan it way in advance because we have the dates locked in. And then the week of, he goes 'Babe I can't come up with anything' and this and that 'it will be expensive' and I'm like, well you've had a whole month and you knew that was your date, and then I end up planning it. Hahaha but to answer your original questions, I don't have a worst date, I don't think. Well the worst ones are the unplanned ones. The ones where he doesn't plan and I end up planning. No date is the worst date! Haha.
What do you love most about each other? M: He makes me laugh, that's probably my favourite. Even when I don't want to laugh, he makes me laugh. J: Umm.. M: Don't throw them all out at one time! J: Haha. Does it have to be light or deep? Are we getting deep or.... well this is sort of light deep haha. I like how she makes my sandwiches.. hahaha. We sound like an old married couple haha - 'I like how she puts my tea bag in the tea' (old man voice) Haha.
I start to move on to next question.. M: That's really what it is?! You like how I make your sandwiches?? J: Yeah...
Pet hates/Bad Habits - especially now that you're newly married: M: Yes he farts a lot! And in bed. Put that in there! J: Yeah but Megs has taken it on too. Hahaha. M: Heyyy!! I've only done it once! J: Like Megs burps a lot now. M: Hahaha we're pretty gross really.
What is one of your happiest memories? J: Wedding day. M: Yeah probably wedding day.
What is something you have learnt from each other, good or bad? M: Oooh, good or bad... ummm, you go. J: Ummmm.. M: I don't think I've learnt anything bad. He's very positive. No actually it's funny he's very positive, but also always comes up with the worst case scenario about something. So that's probably the good and the bad. If it's something he has to do, he thinks of the worst possible scenario to happen, and I'm like 'that's probably not going to happen' but he won't do something just in case that happens. J: At least you're prepared though. M: But also he's very positive, speaks life into a lot of things. J: Ummm.. M: Come on babe, you've got this. J: What I've learnt from you...I've learnt that I thought I was quite a clean person to live with, but living with Megs..I'm not. It doesn't matter how clean I am, she's always cleaner. M: It's true. If I sit here and I see a little strand at the end of the coffee table I wouldn't be able to just leave it, I'd have to get up and move it...yeah.
What is one of the hardest things about being married? J: Compromise. M: Having to deal with conflict straight away, because I like to be quiet and not talk about it until I want to talk about it, but now that you live in the same house you have to, I mean we make a point.. J: Well we've got 2 bedrooms. Haha. M: Haha but yeah having to deal with conflict, just because I don't like to deal with it straight away, but we make it a point and a rule to deal with it before it festers. J: Yeah just compromise for me. Oh and sharing a blanket - a queen blanket. M: He's a blanket thief! J: Well I did suggest getting a king doona, because then it drapes more. M: Yeesss, but then we have all queen sheets and bedding, and king sized sheets are really expensive. J: But you don't need king sized sheets, it's just the doona cover. M: Yeah that's what I meant. J: Just buy an independent doona cover without the set. M: Let's move on from the doona cover.
What's the best thing about being married? M: Oooh, doing life together. Sharing your house, doing everything together I think that's my favourite bit. And waking up next to each other, going to bed next to each other. J: Yeah pretty much. M: And I make you sandwiches. Haha. J: I really enjoy going grocery shopping together. I love it. M: Yeah we do love grocery shopping.
Do you ever feel like you don't have enough space now that you're living together? J: Not really because I came from such a big family anyway, I always just had my bedroom as my space. M: Yeah, well I haven't encountered not having enough space yet. So far so good. Going strong. J: Do you mean like geographical space or... M: No. J: Or emotional space. Haha
What is your partners favourite food? M: Oooh, he's got a lot! I think I would go with Massaman beef curry? Yeah? Is that right? J: Yeah... well pork belly. M: Oh yeah! J: Na it would be both. M: Pork belly is true. J: Megan's would probably be Pad Thai... M: Yeah that's one of - I don't really have a favourite food. J: Or noodles. Like the Migoreng haha.
What are your partner's love languages? M: His are touch and words of affirmation. J: Oh I love after my Monday night boxing sessions just laying down on the couch, my head in her lap and she just rubs my face. M: He's a big fan of tickles..like soft ones.
And what's Megan's? J: Sandwiches. Haha no quality time. M: Yep, it is.
And does that come naturally for you, or is it a struggle? M: It's a struggle. I'll answer that for you. Haha J: No it's not a struggle.. M: Because he sees it differently. He thinks like (I mean it's still time together) but like you know, going to Bunnings and getting something in the car for him is quality time, whereas I think quality time is very different. Like set aside time, uninterrupted time where whatever we are doing it's no distractions no nothing, it's not just 'we so happened to be together that day' thats not quality time. J: But I said to her it's different because my job, especially some days, I might be home by midday, some days I might not start until midday, in which case we could have breakfast together and half the day. Whereas someone who works 9-5 every day and leaves the home at 7:30am and get's home at 6pm and then serves on the weekend or something, then they may need a schedule like Friday and Saturday nights as their quality time. Whereas our schedules at the moment allow us to have different spots of time..which I would consider quality time - you know having breakfast together and not leaving the house until 10:30am in the morning is a good couple of hours... M: Yeah but say we are having breakfast in the morning and he's sitting there, and I'm on my computer eating and he might be on his phone, like even though we are having breakfast together, I don't see that as quality time. Yes it's time spent, but if we went for a walk, like a half hour walk or something, that's quality time I think. J: But you don't like walking?
What's your favourite thing to do together? J: Eat. M: Eat! J: Yeah we love going out. M: We both love good food so definitely eating. J: And travelling. M: Yeah, and travelling.
If you had to choose between having pineapples for hands, or only eating pineapples for the rest of your life, what would you choose? M: Having pineapples for hands! I couldn't just eat pineapples for the rest of my life. J: I'd eat pineapples for the rest of my life I think. Because not having hands would restrict me way too much. M: Well you can feed me good food while you go eat pineapples for the rest of your life. J: But are you eating someone else's pineapple hands, or eating independent pineapples? M: What?! J: Hahaha well those that choose to have pineapple hands, are you eating their pineapple hands or.... hahahahaha M: See! Worst possible scenario! J: That's it! So if Megs has pineapple hands and I'm addicted to this pineapple then I might just eat her hands. M: That's what I mean! Hahaha.
Question for the next couple: What makes you happier in a relationship: Sharing with your partner, or sacrificing something for your partner?