Who doesn't love a good compliment? Whether it's based on how you look, or about your character or performance, everybody loves a compliment. Not everyone knows how to react well to compliments, but I don't know anybody who feels worse for having been given one. And there are so many different levels to compliments. They can be from someone who knows you intimately, or from a complete stranger. They can be a passing comment with not much thought put into them, or be completely heartfelt and be planned and purposeful in honouring a person.
For me personally (and unfortunately for Ezra) I'm generally someone who is more impacted by a strangers compliment than by a compliment given by someone I know well. I'm pretty sure it's because I think 'Oh they have to say that, they're my husband', or 'they're my family'. I guess that makes me someone who is not that great at receiving compliments, but I don't think I'm the only one, am I?
For example I'm lucky enough to have a husband that will tell me that he loves me every day, and in some way, shape or form he will tell me that I look great. But the danger in that is that I pretty much become immune to it. And it's nothing Ezra has done wrong, and it's quite selfish and a 'first world problem' to be honest, but hey as always I'm just trying to keep it real. We have even had conversations where we will be on our way to somewhere and I'll ask Ezra 'Do I look ok?' and he will say 'Are you kidding me? I told you you looked beautiful when you were doing your hair in front of the mirror, and that I loved your outfit.' and I have to think about it for a second and realise 'Oh yeah, you did to'.
But that is something Ezra is very good at. And that is why I called this blog 'The Power of a Genuine Compliment' not just 'a compliment'. So often we can give people compliments in 'passing by' or just say them for the sake of saying them. Now there is nothing wrong with that, like I said it never does any harm, but the difference between that person feeling good for 30 seconds, or them feeling good for the rest of the day, or even the rest of the week, is the detail you go into.
Ezra is very intentional on giving details, and explaining to someone why he thinks they did an awesome job, or what it is exactly that makes them look good. Giving details shows the person that you are actually paying attention, and there is depth in what you are saying, and it obviously makes what you are saying a lot more memorable. It is so important not just with acquaintances, but to really make sure you make the effort to do this with your partner - especially if their love language is words of affirmation. I would say Ezra is great at it, and I'm still working on it. Sorry ladies, don't think this is just for the men to work on their compliments and tell you how good you look all the time, the men need to hear it just as much as we do.
So go out of your way today to give someone a genuine compliment. Whether it be a work colleague, a family member or your spouse. Let someone know how amazing they look, but tell them WHY. And hey, I'd love to hear your stories whether you comment or send me a message, and let me know how it went. Tell me how you made someones day, because after all there is power in your genuine compliment.